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Master Looter Posts: 1225 Joined: 14 Jul 2009 | |
Master Looter Posts: 1148 Joined: 6 Jun 2009 | Suddenly another group of teenagers appeared, only this time red,blue, balck, yellow and pink, and shoed the other ones away. "You've been trying to covet (steal) the farmers cattle, and have murdered, breaking the two of the ten ten commandments!!!" Yelled the red one. "Yeah, and what's it to you?" Asked Death and Livingness. "We are the lords champions, the defenders of Jesus, the CHRISTIAN RANGERS!!!" Suddenly they all pulle dout strange looking devices from their pockets, put them above their heads, each did wierd poses, and, ina large show of sparks that hurt our heroes's eyes, they emerged looking like this!
"Jesus christ!!!" Where do those sparks come from!?" Asked Ram, rubbing his eyes. "Dont ask me, ask their special effects supervisor." Said Orgazmo, before getting Karate kicked simaoultaneousy by all 5 Christian Rangers, in a flash of even more bright sparks, into Ram, lazor, and Frohman, which also caused sparks. "Owww....my tiny G-Mod penis." Said Frohman, at the bottom of the pile up of himself lazor, Ram, and Orgazmo. "Owwww, my baby blue eyes..." Said Ram, rubbing furiously at his eyes in order to get them working again after being exposed to the cheap special effects of the CHRISTIAN RANGERS. |
Master Looter Posts: 2594 Joined: 19 Jan 2009 | "Christian Rangers, eh? You guys ever hear of the Norse Gods?" Ram causally asked, trying his best not to stumble around from the SPARKS. "Oh, then I guess that the following isn't really happening, eh?" Ram said with a faint smile. Suddenly, his horns began to spark with electricity, building in energy until his whole head was glowing. "EGADS! He must use devil-magic! We must form, CHRISTRON!" the Christian Rangers cried, before running off. "That's for making Christ look bad!" Ram yelled after them. "Guys a nice dude, though a bit of a tetotalitarian." |
Master Looter Posts: 1148 Joined: 6 Jun 2009 | Suddenly, from several thousand feet away... "Thunder Noid T-rex power!" Yelled the red christian ranger. "Thunder Noid Triceratops power!" Yelled the blue ranger. "Thunder Noid Mastadon power!" Yelled the black ranger. "Thunder Noid Saber Tooth Tiger power!" Yelled the Yellow ranger. "Terradactly!" Yelled the Pink Ranger. Suddenly, from another beam of light, 5 mighty animal like robots came down The Rangers, using their amazing jumping abilities, lept into the cockpits of each, and fused the robots together to form a massive Jesus Christ, CHRISTRON, with Mighty Giant Robot Fighting action! |
Power Leveler Posts: 4510 Joined: 3 Jun 2009 | FOIL |
Power Leveler Posts: 4606 Joined: 12 Feb 2009 | The Christron mechazoid stepped forward and was ready for battle. "We have God on our side!" Said the Might Morphin Christan Ranger. "This makes no sense? What kinda of Christians actually support violence?" Said Maddawg. "The Exreme kind!" Said the rangers holding there swords into the air. "Another thing? Why do they have dinosaurs? That completley bypasses the theroy of Genesis." "Uh..." "And why do you guys form Robots? The blueprints must go against the church somehow? The Christian rangers looked at one another before getting out and liting Christron on fire. "TAKE THAT DEVIL SEED!" Said the Red Ranger |
Master Looter Posts: 2136 Joined: 25 Jun 2009 | Suddenly, a stream of plasma hit the mechazoid, knocking it down. The group turned around to see the Arbiter, standing on top of a Scarab walker. "Looks like you already forgot about me." said the Arbiter "I will not have my prize taken away by a squad of religious fanatics in colorful outfits. Give yourself over Maddawg, now." "Or else what?" said Maddawg An entire platoon of covenant soldiers came off the scarab and surrounded the group. "Crap." said Dark Link "Oh yes, and I do remember you from evil alien school Maddawg" said the Arbiter "I believe you were the one who used to beat me up after mass genocide class." |
Master Looter Posts: 1148 Joined: 6 Jun 2009 | "And now for the ass whoopin...." Said Ram, using Thors Smack to send a massive cascade of Thunder upon the Might Morphin Christian Rangers, knocking them into a lake. Suddenly, epic music from Jaws played as Jaw's teenaged son, Maw's came from benath the lake and swallowed the rnagers whole, looking all cool in his pimpin acne and lack of self esteem! (Like me Ram, Adam, Whatever the fuck Shapsters reall name is, Grimm sho, Samii, essentially everyone here from age 13-22!!!! Yay!!!) "Jesus Christ!!! We gotta get out of here!" Yelled the real california farmers as they made like Orgazmo's virginity the hell out of there in their pick up trucks. "What are you talking to me for?" Asked Jesus. "Yay!!! The real california farmers and the christian rangers are defeated!!!" Yelled the happy cows, coming from their hiding places. "No applause No applause, the spooning of several of you will do." Said Orgazmo, as he closed his eyes thinking the cows were gonna hold him up as their hero, only to open his eyes in surprise as the cows picked up Ram and embraced him as their heroes, and whisped him away to Real California Pizz Kictchen down the road. "Normrally I'd feel cock blocked right now, but sense Ram has neve gotten any cock, or pussy for that matter,and I have many a time, I feel happy." Said Orgazmo, in tears of joy. "Ummmm... have you forgotten the aliens right behind you?" Asked lazor. Orgazmo turned back and saw the scarab charge it's main gun, aimed at him. "Oh yeah, I forgot about that...." |
Master Looter Posts: 1210 Joined: 10 Feb 2009 | Ragnorak leaned on the side of the tank. "Fortunat'ly, I didn'." The main gun's barrel fell off as he strode forward, one hand pulling a cigarette out of his pocket and lighting it as the other swung Wyrmbane's blunt edge up to rest on his shoulder. The Arbiter stared in disbelief as his Scarab tank fell to pieces. "NO! You...you will pay...that was a gift from my grandma! Asshole..." Ragnorak looked over his shoulder at Arby. "Do somethin' 'bout it den, ya pansy! Ice Make: Fallen Angel." a blizzard sprang up around Rag as he stopped and turned. It quickly solidified into a pair of (seemingly) feathered wings on his back that glistened in the sun. He now had wings of ice. "Got somethin' to say?" Rag said around his cigarette. "'Cause I ain' takin' no bull from a puppy." He flicked the ash off his cigarette and put it back in his mouth. Wyrmbane had not yet left his shoulder. The Arbiter got a look. It was...well actually, I can't really explain it, but it seemed almost like fear, awe and anger mixed into one. "You dare compare me to canines? Fool! I will destroy you!" His energy sword sprang to his hand, the blade glowing brightly despite the sunlight. Arby flipped over the rubble of the Scarab, locking swords with Rag as Wyrmbane moved to block. The dog-like alien growled in his face and pushed him back. "Your sword should be cut! What metal is this..." "Th' kin' tha' slays dragons. Le's dance, Fido." Rag grinned in the Arbiter's face and spread his wings, a blast of cold air going out from them. He pushed down with them once, creating a strong downdraft that forced the Arbiter away, letting Rag charge him and bring the heft of the tip of the blade into play, it being thicker and heavier than the rest of the blade. Sparks flew as the swords met. The Arbiter was forced onto the defensive as Rag showed off his 300 years of sword training, Wyrmbane traversing deadly arcs in the air. The Arbiter was clearly outmatched in swordplay. Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear--not absence of fear. Except a creature be part coward it is not a compliment to say it is brave; it is merely a loose misapplication of the word. |
Master Looter Posts: 2596 Joined: 29 Jul 2009 | Meanwhile, Back in the real world... Panic spreads across the school as the boy made his emotion-filled massacre. Students were asked to stay in their classrooms, but Phil knew something was wrong, so he snuck out of his first period class to see what the commotion was about. He tiptoed quietly around the halls, in hopes to avoid detection. He makes it to the lunchroom where he finds the boy killing a girl. A cheerleader to be exact. Phil eyes widen in terror as he finds out who this boy is. "Lloyd?!" he says, surprised. "Phil? You're alive?!" Lloyd says, equally astounded. "I get in a coma, and you go all homicidal on the school?!" "You don't understand! once you were gone, the jocks knew i would've been vulnerable! Without you, i would've been an easy target for their torment!" "Lloyd, you gotta stop this!" Phil pleaded Around this time cops start to enter the school, searching for Lloyd. One of them find the lunchroom, and stays low so he won't be found. Lloyd steps closer to Phil. "I don't wanna kill you Phil. You were like a brother to me. But i need to know: Are you with me? Or against me?" Lloyd says, putting a gun to Phil's chest. Before Phil could answer, the cop springs from behind cover. This startles Lloyd, which accidentally makes him pull the trigger. A bullet goes straight through Phil. He grabs his chest. It is warm and wet with his blood. As he falls, his once-best friend watches in terror. Lloyd kneels, eyes welling up with tears, as he holds Phil in his arms. "No! you can't die!" Lloyd says sobbing Phil tries to get a word out, but ends up coughing up blood. Then, he slumps, dead. Lloyd begins bawling at the loss of his friend. With one bullet left in his clip, he puts it to his head, and presses the trigger. BANG. He falls down lifelessly, next to Phil. The cop walks from behind his cover, then puts his radio to his mouth. "I'm gonna need two body bags. The killer has been immobilized, but took a life before he ended his." the cop said As he gotten closer to the bodies, he noticed phil. He got back on the radio. "One of the deceased, was the boy from that bus wreck last month. He didn't even last a week." the cop says, closing Phil's eyes. |
Master Looter Posts: 1148 Joined: 6 Jun 2009 |
Meanwhile... in the Real California Pizza Kitchen in the valley of the happy cows...... "Ram Ram Ram Ram Ram Ram Ram Ram Ram Ram Ram Ram Ram Ram Ram Ram Ram Ram Ram!!!" The happy cows shouted as he was break dancing on a table, and eating a slice of paper and tin can pizza, a goats favorite, to the song Get down tonight by KC and the Sunshine band. "Ram, your so manly." Said Samii wincing her eyes. Suddenly, ram slipped of the table and scrathed his leg on the fall down. "Ow!!! Mommy, I make a boboo!!!" Said Ram before crying like a little baby bitch. "Dont cry Rammy poo." Said Samii, holding ram in her arms and rocking him like a baby. "Works everytime....." Said Ram in his head, a smirk running over his face. MEANWHILE!!!!! Before Rag and Arby could fight anymore however, Orgazmo intervened, and literally cock slapped Arby 100 feet into the air and fell hard into the wreckage of teh scarab. |
Adventurer Posts: 479 Joined: 25 Jun 2009 | Grimm stared it him, "What... THE.. Fuck.. Is with you.. And slapping people with your dick..."...? He watched the Arbiter fly and fall.. He walked over to him.. "Hey, You okay.."..? Arby stood up holding his face.. Thing.. "Wort.. Should have not done that.. Scum.."! Arby began to slash at Grimm with his Energy sword, Grimm could barely dodge it.. Till' he began to use his legs.. "Arbiter.. You cant beat me.."! He said before kicking arby in the gut, "You finally got my adrenaline rushing.."! Arby then swift kicked Grimm in the side breaking some bones and causing him to spit up blood, "Gr..".. Grimm then used his final attack and blew arby 50 feet into the ground... Half-Hour later~ |
Master Looter Posts: 1148 Joined: 6 Jun 2009 | MEANWHILE!!!! It was a sad and somber ride for Philips parents, in the back of the Ambulance. They had already seen their son comatose, and shed many tears. Now their son was dead, and there tears were all dried up from crying a river the last time they rode in an ambulance with him. In their joyless grief, however, they failed to notice the ill wind that blew into the Ambulance.... "Philip......" Said a voice, unheard to Philips parents. MEANWHILE, AT THE PUB OF THE GODS!!! "Dont cry Ramy poo..." Said Samii cradling Ram in her arms, in Lokkis crystal ball, a smirk appearing on Ram's face. "Hmmmmm....its appears that the servant of my most acursed step brother Thor is finally about to lose his boneless'ness, ala virginity, to some Happy Cow...." Said Lokki, in a bathroom stall in the pub. "Not on I, the god of mischief's watch!!! I shall send my most favorite son, the crazy'est Half Puerto-Rican Half Panamanian sociopathic optimist, leader of the Wierdo's, Micheal Rodriguez!!!" MEANWHILE AT THE REAL CALIFORNIA PIZZA KITCHEN!!! "What do you say, we go to the backroom, so that you can put your coin in my vending machine?" Asked Samii. "FUCK YEAH!!!" Shouted Ram, as Samii was carrying him to the land of no-more blue balls. Suddenly however, in a burst of sparks that set the Real California Pizza Kitchen on fire, and forced everyone inside to flee, Micheal Rodriguez, in his pimpin Blue Daedric Armor appeared! "God dammit!!!" Yelled Ram rubbing his eyes from all the sparks. |
Master Looter Posts: 2136 Joined: 25 Jun 2009 | "How the hell are you still alive?" Dark Link asked the Arbiter "I had an overshield on." said the Arbiter "Where the heel is that platoon of aliens I had earlier?" "I killed them." said Dark Link The Arbiter turned to Dark Link, not believing what he had heard. "You killed them?" said the Arbiter "Yup." answered Dark Link "That's not possible, you couldn't have killed every single..." "I did. "See, there's the bodies of them, piled over there." said Dark Link, pointed at a mass of corpses "YOU SHALL PAY, HERETIC!" yelled the Arbiter, charging Dark Link Dark Link rolled out of the way, avoided the Arbiter's strike. He pulled out his flaming sword and sliced at the Arbiter, breaking his shields. The Arbiter stepped back and activated his camouflage. "Haha!" laughed the Arbiter "How do you hope to kill what you cannot see?" Dark Link pulled out a pistol and shot the Arbiter in his leg, crippling him. "How did you spot me?!" said the Arbiter "I saw your glowing sword." "Damn." said the Arbiter "I knew that I should have turned it off. By the way, since when did Dark Link use guns?" "Um...uh...shut up." said Dark Link, before shooting the Arbiter in his other leg. |
Power Leveler Posts: 4606 Joined: 12 Feb 2009 | "Link. Dude relax. This guy is pathetic. Me and Saren use to give him swrilies in the School bathroom." Said Maddawg. "YOU GUYS WERE JERKS!" "Shut up Shirley!" "MY NAME'S NOT SHIRLEY!" "He does look like a Shirley" said Splazor looking at the Arbiter's face. "Okay I got an idea. Who ever thinks we should sell him to Area 51 and make a quick buck out of it RAISE YOUR HANDS!" Said Maddawg Every member of the group raised there hands with the exceptions of Ram and Splazor. *Splazor raises his hands* "*Sigh* Or your Hooves." "Finnally!" Said Ram lifting his left hoove up. |
Master Looter Posts: 1210 Joined: 10 Feb 2009 | Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear--not absence of fear. Except a creature be part coward it is not a compliment to say it is brave; it is merely a loose misapplication of the word. |
Power Leveler Posts: 4606 Joined: 12 Feb 2009 | |
Master Looter Posts: 1148 Joined: 6 Jun 2009 | Suddenly, Micheal kicked Ram and the face, knockcing him into Dark Link and Maddawg. As ram, Dark Link, and Maddawg did so, Orgazmo turned around, looked around at Micheal, an istantly knew the group was in trouble. "God dammit!!! What the hell is Micheal Rodriguez doing here!?" "You know this Daedric armored man?" Asked Rag, katanas out. "Yep. Me and his group have gotten into our fair share of conflicts...." Said Orgazmo. "What do you mean conflicts?" Asked lazor. Suddenly, micheal spoke. "He means me and my team beat his ass, and not in the way he likes it." Said Micheal. |
Master Looter Posts: 1210 Joined: 10 Feb 2009 | Ragnorak twirled his falchion and drew another cigarette, lighting it nonchalantly. He took a deep draw and blew the smoke back out. "Well den, why ain't ya kickin' 'is ass?" he asked of the over-sexed superhero. "I...don't know. Pardon me while I beat him like my junk." Orgazmo turned to the be-armored man and leaped at him, hip-thrusting madly. Ragnorak took another draw on his cigarette, pinched it out, put it behind his ear and sat down, tipping his fedora forward over his eyes, laying Wyrmbane on his lap, falling asleep. Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear--not absence of fear. Except a creature be part coward it is not a compliment to say it is brave; it is merely a loose misapplication of the word. |
Master Looter Posts: 1148 Joined: 6 Jun 2009 | 10 seconds later..... Ragnorack woke in surprsie as Orgazmo was thrown at him, sending both crashing to the ground. |
Master Looter Posts: 1210 Joined: 10 Feb 2009 | Rag landed on his ass, his fedora landing on an outstretched tree branch, Wyrmbane still in his hand. It was a wonder Orgazmo hadn't been impaled on it. "Ho'kay, bud, ya jus' made i' puhsunal. Ya goin' down." Retrieving his hat, he put the blunt edge of the falchion on his shoulder. "Ice Make: Frozen Redemption," he said, extending his index and middle fingers on his left hand (the one not holding Wyrmbane) out and twitching them straight up. A pillar of ice smacked Michael in the chin as it came out of the ground at twenty miles an hour. Rag stabbed his fingers forward. A pole of ice came out of the pillar and caught the armored man in the stomach at fifteen miles an hour. "Ice Make: Blossom," said Rag, forming a fist and then opening it quickly. Michael, still in mid-flight, was encased in a flower of ice which then shattered outwards and inwards at the same time, dropping him to the ground with spikes of ice in the chinks of his armor. Blood leaked out and pooled on the grass as he groaned. "'Ave fun, bud. I nee' a nap." said Rag to Orgazmo as he laid back down and put his fedora back over his eyes, forming a cage of ice around himself, one nearly impossible to shatter, saying "Ice Make: Vines" while interlacing his fingers after sheathing Wyrmbane. He went back to sleep. Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear--not absence of fear. Except a creature be part coward it is not a compliment to say it is brave; it is merely a loose misapplication of the word. |
Master Looter Posts: 1148 Joined: 6 Jun 2009 | Orgazmo was about to finish Micheal, but then, suddenly, Micheal shattered into a 100 littler Micheals, and lept on to Orgazmo. Orgazmo tryed punching the mini-micheals off him, but due to their agilty, they managed to avoid the punches, the only thing Orgazmo managing to do, was hurting himself. While he was weakened from punching himself in the stomach, the mini Micheals entered his body, and made their way into his mind, deafeating the sexually crazed brain cells in the computer that were his motor functions. "Micheal!!! Inject viagras into Orgazmo's body!" Said a Micheal to another Micheal. "Yes Micheal sir!!!" Said another Micheal, as he commanded a console that made orgazmo swallow his viagra, Causing Orgazmo's anf to quadruple in size and hardness (which was saying alot). "Good Micheal, now smash that ice shield that ninja has around himself!!!" Said one Micheal to another Micheal. "Yes Micheal Sir!!!" Said a micheal, moxing Orgazmo's foward against his will, and smashing Rag's ice shield. "Now commence with the fag kiss!!!" Yelled A Micheal. "Yes Micheal!!!" Suddenly orgazmo lurched forward, grabbed Rag, and kissed him in the kouth. "Good!!! Micheals!!! Prepare to board the ninja's body!!!" "Yes micheal sir!!!" 1 second later... "Lets you go you cock munchers!!! Go go go go!!!" Yelled a Sarge Micheal to all the Micheals that were leaping into Rag's mouth, the Srage himself barley making it into Rag's maw before Rag karate kicked Orgazmo into Oblivion. "Dude what the fact was that for?!" Asked Rag, before all of a sudden standing still. MEANWHILE!!! "We'll never give in to you invaders!!!" Yelled the Brain Cell of Rag that controlled Bravery, before getting blown to bits by the Micheal's AK-47, along with all the other brain cells in charge of Rag's motor skills. Several seconds later.... "What the fuck is going on here?" Asked Dark Link, moving his hands in front of Rag's face, all the other heroes gathered around him. Suddenly, Rag lept high into the air, and with a drop kick, knocked Dark link 50 feet into the ground, and lunged at Maddawg. |
Master Looter Posts: 1210 Joined: 10 Feb 2009 | Unfortunately for the mini-Mickey's, Ragnorak wasn't human. He was technically a fallen angel. Thus, not only was his regenerative factor far, far higher than most humans, he also had an immune system that would learn from every invasion and attack. So... *FIFTEEN SECONDS OF PAIN LATER* "'Ey, why's ev'rybo'y layin' about? Yeesh, I take a fif'een se'ond nap an' 'is place goes to 'Ell in a 'andbasket!" The mini-Michaels found themselves facing brain cells in MJOLNIR armor now. One of the cells ran to the forebrain and told it something was up. "Cleanse," said Rag. A soft blue light shone from within him and the mini-Michaels died of overexposure to gamma radiation. The cells quickly regenerated their defense and swept up the bodies. Meanwhile, outside, Rag pointed at Orgazmo and said "Cleanse" again. The same soft blue light washed the Viagra out of his body, reducing his wang back to it's (admittedly still large) normal size. Then Rag grabbed all the heroes and villains, who had ganged up to try to stop him from killing Maddawg and had slowed him down enough that his immune system had kicked in. They were all seriously injured though. he piled them all up roughly and said "Curaja," healing them all fully. As they awoke, they saw Rag standing in front of them, a green light fading from his hand and just the hint of fading feathered wings on his back. Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear--not absence of fear. Except a creature be part coward it is not a compliment to say it is brave; it is merely a loose misapplication of the word. |
Epic’d Out Posts: 5565 Joined: 16 Dec 2008 | "WHAT!?" yelled Master Kitty staring at Rag, "He is a monkey, ninja and an angel?! Talk about a triple threat!" |
Master Looter Posts: 2136 Joined: 25 Jun 2009 | Rag turned to Master Kitty, eyes red with rage. "I! AM! NOT! A! NINJA MONKEY!!!!!!" yelled Rag Rag dropkicked Master Kitty in the groin, sending him flying into the moon. Meanwhile, at the D.L.A. base... Xandus is sitting at his desk. Revan enters the room. "Hey bro." said Revan "I got some bad news, the Arbiter hasn't reported back yet. That can't be good." "Fuck." said Xandus Xandus picked up his Soul Edge and got up from his chair. "If you what something to be done right, you'll have to do it yourself." said Xandus "Get me a ship to Nexus, I'm going to go locust hunting." |
Master Looter Posts: 2596 Joined: 29 Jul 2009 | Meanwhile, somewhere else... All seemed lost for Phil. He was at the end of his rope. All that was left for him was his eventual judgment. Would he make it to those pearly gates above, or be damned to the eternal hellfire below? He got his answer. Suddenly, air fills his lungs. He jerks straight up, gasping and wheezing for vital oxygen. Then he looks around. He's in another hospital. "Was it just another dream?" he says puzzled But what Phil is experiencing is better than any dream. Something on his arm catches his attention. It's a bright gold bracelet, and on it is Phil's full name, his date of birth and date of death. He looks around the place. Nothing out of the ordinary, phil just figured it was a regular ol hospital, that is, until he got out of his bed. To Phil's amazement, he was hovering above the ground, as if he was light as a feather. Then a bright being appears behind him. The entity was so bright that covering your eyes wouldn't shield them from the light. "Don't worry son, it'll take getting used to." the being said "Who are you? what is this place?" Phil said, trying to not look directly at the light before him. The being chuckles heartily, before patting Phil's shoulder. "Isn't it obvious? I am GOD. And you are in heaven. The place of eternal resting. And you are Philip James Howard, right?" "Yes sir" "Well, i'm sorry Phil, but i can't put your soul to rest as of yet. I need you to do something for me..." |
Master Looter Posts: 1148 Joined: 6 Jun 2009 | Suddenly Rag felt queezy, and vomited several hundred mini-micheals on the group, which then fused together to form 1 normal Micheal. "What in the name of the god's!? I thought my immune system...." Said Rag, before Micheal Interuppted. "You thoght you killed me. I get that alot from other high level mortals who I've been inside of." "But how the fuck..." Started Rag before being silenced by Micheal mid-sentence. "Why? As much as I'd like to tell you, I'm afraid kicking your asses and making jack-asses of yourselves has bored me and strayed me away from my real goal." Said Micheal Suddenly, Micheal appeared behind ram, picked him up, and yelled:"That is, to make sure Ram has blue balls forever!" "Hey put me down Jack-ass!!!" Yelled Ram before he, along with Micheal were teleproted away. "No!!! Raaaaaammmmm!!!!!" Yelled Orgazmo and Samii on their knees, shouting to the heavens. Suddenly, Micheal alone reappeared, and said:"If you want to find Ram, you must find him, in the most abandoned place in the ugliest city in California. Only then will you have any hope of saving him from bone-lessness. With that Micheal teleported away for good. |
Power Leveler Posts: 4606 Joined: 12 Feb 2009 | "Okay so....how about we sell this guy to Area 51." "But what about my Rammy-poo!" said Samii (Who for some reason appeared when I wasen't paying attention. Seriously Emmy Ram was going over to Samii's house to help her with her posts. You didn't need to introduce her yourself.) "I don't care for some stupid farm animal." said Maddawg picking up the Unconcious Arbiter, who had fainted due to extreme awsomeness of the fight. "We can't just leave him to die?" Said Rag. "Well you guys can go to Burbank California but me and Link and this little cutie are going to New Mexico." Said Maddawg while he pinched the Arbiter's cheek "Your not going anywhere!" Said Orgazmo launching his penis attack at Maddawg. Maddawg quickly ducked below the attack and got close to him with his Chainsaw. "Paging Doctor Maddawg! Time for you to preform a Vasectomy!" As he did his Rated mature chainsaw thing. FIVE MINUTES LATER Orgazmo was on the floor crying. His hands were between his legs blood dripping down it. "Enjoy being Sterile." Said Maddawg as he and Link jumped onto a Reaver with the Arbiter. |
Master Looter Posts: 1148 Joined: 6 Jun 2009 | Suddenly, Orgazmo's wang grew back. "What the fuck?" Asked Maddawg "Yeah, being the bastard son of the greek and roman goddess of love has its advantages." Said Orgazmo. "Such as access to Cupids Thompson Sub-Machine gun!!!!" Said Orgazmo pulling out a pink tommy guns with a barrel like that of a heart. "Whoa, talk about a love gun." Said lazor. "Wait a minute, I thought cupid used a bow." Said Samii. "He did, but then he realized guns were better then bows." Said Orgazmo, firing bolts of love at Maddawgs ass as he flew away in his reaver, knocking him out, Mddawg awakening to the sight of his reaver, falling madly in love with it. |
Master Looter Posts: 2136 Joined: 25 Jun 2009 | Meanwhile, at a Locust City... A locust soldier is patrolling the perimeter of a fortress. "Dododoodo, patrolling the perimeter!" sung the locust. "Dododoodo... The locust soldier was cut off as a gauss shell hit him, killing him instantly. In the distance was a mech equipped with rockets and a cannon. Beneath it was the demon Xandus and a russian arms dealer. "So if I buy thirty-two mechs, I get the thirty-third free?" asked Xandus "Yes." said the russian arms dealer "It's a very good deal. You should take it." "Very well." said Xandus "What mechs do you have?" "Mad Cats, Timberwolves, Catapults, Uziels, Cougars, Thors, a shitload of battle-mech suits, a couple of Blood Asps..." "Blood Asp? What's that?" asked Xandus A giant red mech with two cannons on it appeared from a platform above. It charged two balls of dark energy, then fired them both at the locust city, destroying it instantly. "...I'll take fifty." said Xandus "In fact, give me all the mechs you have." Xandus handed the russian man a suitcase containing 4 billion dollars. "They will arrive at your headquarters in two hours." said the russian man "Excellent." said Xandus "Soon, Nexus will be destroyed." |
Master Looter Posts: 1148 Joined: 6 Jun 2009 | MEANWHILE, IN AN ABANDONED URBAN YOUTH CENTER IN THE SHITTIER PART OF LA....... "Let me go you fucking asshole!!!" Yelled Ram, tied down to the floor by Niflheimian chains, to Micheal, who was taking of his helmet, and who then decided to throw it at Ram's head. As ram's vision gained back focus, he saw that Micheal was younger then he expected, about 11, and wore glasses. As Ram was pondering how he got subdued by a child, Micheal fixed his the position of his glasses and said:"Your probably wondering how a little beaner child kicked your as. Well, as you've probably guessed by the chains currently binding you to the earth, it is because I have a touch of the Norse gods in me. That, and my step sister Hel taught me that chain ability." Said Micheal. Suddenly, Ram came to a conclusion. "By the gods.... your Lokki's son, arent you?" Asked Ram. "One of them. You know how Zeus used to be?" "Yeah?" "Well father's like that plus superman plus steriods." Said Micheal. |
Master Looter Posts: 2596 Joined: 29 Jul 2009 | Elsewhere... Phil and GOD suddenly appear on top of a summit, Phil stumbles back, amazed at the view of the various universes. "This is the Summit of the Cosmos. It's where the various universe overlords come to see if there is any universe god that need assistance with the universe they rule." "Damn" Phil says, before quickly covering his mouth. GOD gives him a stink eye. "You don't mind if swear a bit, right?" Phil says "Ah, what hell. i don't see why not. After all, i did create the words, voices, and languages of the various universes. I guess a few muttered obscenities wouldn't hurt" "Cool. But why did you bring me here?" Phil asked, sitting on the edge of the summit. "You remember when The Auditor restarted his universe right? Once it got back on track, its heroes fell straight into trouble. I'm gonna need you to help them out them out for a bit. You're okay with that right?" "Are you kidding?! It'll be awesome to meet up with the heroes and villains of the AA universe once again!" Phil exclaimed but then frowns, and looks down at his hands. "But my powers, they disappeared once i came out the coma..." "Yeah, i'll take care of that" GOD touches Phil's forehead. And in a flash of light, all of Phil's powers are restored. But instead of his arms being a dark black, they were now a bright white, and his right hand now glows a bright blue than orange. "But what about my infinity staff?" Phil asks. "Do you see the gold bracelet on your arm?" "Yeah, i meant to ask about it earlier." "It is your Halcyon and Light Object, or H.a.L.O for short. i use it as a tracking device for angels that are in other universes. It will also serve as your Infinity Staff. Also, you might want to try out your wings before you use them in a real world situation." "I get wings?!" "Well of course! you are an angel right? Go ahead, try them out!" Suddenly pure energy spouts out of Phil's back, lashing about like tentacles, before shaping into wings. Then Phil takes off, soaring through the air, majestic and graceful. Phil touches down before GOD "I'm counting on you to take care of the heroes and their quest. Just don't die okay?" "Of course. I'm pretty sure you saw how epic i was before their universe was restarted, right? Whatever challenges me and the AA heroes face, i'm sure we'll come out on top" Phil says proudly. "Very well then. i wish you the best of luck in your assistance to the heroes." GOD snaps his fingers and Phil disappears. Phil appears in the AA universe, in their version of LA. "Okay, Multi told me that the story would continue in LA at some youth center or something" Phil said, turning around to face the building he was standing in front of. It has "This is the story, dumbass" in front of the building in bright Gold letters. "Well this must be it" He says, busting down the door as epically as psychically possible. |
Master Looter Posts: 1148 Joined: 6 Jun 2009 | Suddenly, the building exploded and knocked Phil into a pawn shop, which then collapsed on him. Philip got up from the wreckage, and saw a giant set of words saying:"Not there you idiot! The building next to it!!!" MEANWHILE!!! "You sure this is the place?" Asked Rag to Orgazmo, who was now leading the group into an abandoned Warehouse. "The place where we can get some help with fighting Micheal? Yeah." "Noooo... he means the place where that smelly oily wet back can be found who's holding Ramy Poo!" Yelled Samii. "Then no." Said Orgazmo, stealthy opening the back door entrance, and accidently taking it off its hinges and, alerting the many 12-16 year old Black and Hispanic kids armed with AK-47's and Double barreled sawed off shotguns to our heroe's presence, the barrels of their guns aimed at the heads, lower area, and hearts of our heroes. |
Master Looter Posts: 2594 Joined: 19 Jan 2009 | "And...I don't know. I've always felt like I needed to fight for my life. To prove myself...to prove my dad that I ain't a pussy, yah know?" the 12 year old kid with the AK said, wiping the tears and snot off his face with his baggy sleeve. *Sniff*"You're...you're right! I don't need no one else!" "Nother thing you-*MUNCH*-neef to wearn," Ram continued saying, his mouth full as he bite through his ropes, "is dat you need to fink a little-*PETUY!*-before you make them decisions." Ram stood up from his chair, stretching to loosen his muscles a bit. "...Um...uh..." Ram went towards the nearest exit, hoping to find his friends or at least a way out. |
Master Looter Posts: 1148 Joined: 6 Jun 2009 | Suddnely, the golden raven pulled out a baseball bat and beat Ram unconscious for trying to escape(and misinterpreting Emmy's post silly) and chained Ram up again, Ghostrider style. The Golden Raven then shifted back into Micheal. "I told you Ram. I'm one of Lokki's sons. Reality is as moldable as butter to me. Also, I am 12, and technically I have two father's, and one mother? How? Just read the story of Thesues's birth again, if you somehow manage to survive the blunt trauma to your fucktarded brain." Said Micheal, before hitting ram one more time on the head for good measure. |
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"OMG, the white, blue, red, yellow and pink teenagers!" Livingness exclaimed. He crouched down, picked up a rock and threw it at the red one.
"OMFG, SRSLY?" Death inquired. He followed suit and started throwing pine-cones at the multi-coloured teenagers.
"Oh no, pine-cones! My only weakness!" the green one cried, and crumbled into dust.
"How odd... None of the others seem to be affected..." Death pondered.
"Of course! It's because of their elemental weaknesses!" Livingness explained. "Each of the multi-coloured teenagers is weak against one of the 5 elements: Pine-Cone, Milk, Lava, Plastic and Ghostlyness!"
"But... None of those are elements!" Ram stuttered.
"Chinese elements, idiot..." Death muttered.